6th February 2012

gigs clubbing art comedy theatre blog competitions

Illustration by Julie Khan

I Heart Spoonfed

Yes, the time has come. After what seems like forever keeping the good folks of London informed about the best things to do in this splendid city of ours, we’ve decided to put on our own little party and invite everyone along. We’ve teamed up with super-cool monthly party-starters I Heart to put on this lovely bash at the Macbeth in Hoxton and we’d be delighted if you’d like to join us. We’re going to have a free barbeque on the charming roof terrace, plenty of Spoonfed freebies and give-aways as well as music from some of our favourite DJs and promoters.

Want to get on the exclusive guest list? Text spoon party to 89080 to get guaranteed entry to I Heart Spoonfed!

Fear not however: just because we’re putting on our own event doesn’t mean we’ll stop telling you about everything else that’s going on. Next week, London re-awakens from its summer slumber with an almighty plethora of wonderful things to do: art about clouds, an exhibition fundraising party, a 1000-year long song and Nabokov’s seminal paedo-yarn. Lol(ita).

Friday 4th

Stripes: check. Stings: check. Ability to produce honey: check. Yup, there can be no doubt about it, bees totally frickin' rule. And it looks like those lovely folks at the South Bank Centre agree too. The first weekend of September sees a load of venues round the area taken over by a swarm of different insects (with bees featuring rather

Set in Hainault Forest, a beautiful woodland area just outside London, Offset Festival is quite a change from your usual mudfest. With over 150 artists playing over 7 stages, there's something here to satisfy everyone. They get some pretty big headliners as well; last year saw Wire and Gang Of Four rocking the main stage. Unbelievably this year is

Many, many people would name the movie based on Stephen King's novella, The Shawshank Redemption starring Tim Robbins and Morgan Freeman, as their favourite film of all time. It's so great, it even breaks down the resistance of hardened Spoonfed cynics. You have to love it. Produced by Dublin's Gaiety Theatre, the stage version is by all

Saturday 5th

Live At The Chapel has been running for nearly two years and it still manages to produce top class bills every month. Tonight's line-up consists of the bumbling charms of comedy whirlwind Mark Watson, the eccentric and spontaneous Phil Kay, if.comedy nominee and character comedian Pippa Evans and the lovable and laconic Alun Cochrane. There will

Alpha-Ville is the first in a series of audiovisual events. They mesh electronic music, digital media, visual treats and short film.

Within the plush environs of Bloomsbury's Horse Hospital, the debut looks subversive and interesting, straying from the predictable clubnight formula and importing cutting edge European talent to the heart of London.

Glue returns after a storming launch party, dishing up a caustic bumper crop of electro, breaks, house and all breeds of rave. Heading up this edition are excellent bass-face buccaneers and Z Shed residents the Pirate Soundsystem. Fidget, bassline, grime, breaks and dubstep in one handy package. Hot on their heels is Mr No Hands - resident of

Sunday 6th

You know that mysterious black object that the creepy family is staring at on the cover of Led Zeppelin's 'Presence' album? Fol Chen sound like that.

Well with a bit more Amun Dull and Pere Ubu thrown in, but you get the picture. Anyway, tonight the LA dance punks make a triumphant return to The Windmill, and it should get really messy.

Stanhope is a raging, no-holds-barred stand-up and is probably the closest thing you will see to Bill Hicks working in comedy today. He himself describes his act as 'fetish'; a kind of comedy that's been beaten until it's both black and blue. It's wrong, it's sick, but you're getting a kick out of it at the same time. He managed to trigger a

Monday 7th

One of the first artists to successfully blend traditional folk with the electronic beats of trip hop, singer-songwriter Beth Orton can lay claim to being one of the UK's most influential musical exports of the past 20 years.

Taking the stage at The Pigalle Club for two intimate performances. These rare acoustic performances will celebrate the re-release of her successful début album 'Trailer Park'.

Brian Cox performs perhaps the best novel ever written as a 90 minute monologue, adapted from Vladimir Nabokov's masterpiece by Richard Nelson.

Lolita is always a shade controversial, especially in these paedophile-sensitive times, but anyone familiar with the text knows this as one of the greatest obsessional love stories ever told.

Tuesday 8th

Promising you that this isn't just about a trip to your local Italian, Notes on Lasagne is Jono Gadsby's brand new dark comedy about friendship developing in the most unlikely of situations...attempted suicide!

Featuring Peter Rae and Peter Clapp who recently received rave reviews for their performance in Tis Pity She's a Whore at The White Bear.

Following his hugely successful BBC series The History of the World Backwards comedian, author and political activist Robert Newman returns to the stage for the Greenwich Comedy Festival.

Newman has been locked in the library for months working on the follow-up to his third novel, The Fountain At The Centre Of The World so this is a rare opportunity to see the anti-establishment comic before he returns to his writing cave. If you like the funny political diatribes of Mark Thomas, you will love this guy.

Wednesday 9th

This looks cirrus-ly brilliant. Sorry... Luke Howard (1772-1864) was a British manufacturing chemist and amateur meteorologist best known today for coming up with the naming system for clouds that we still use to this day.

He was a prominent member of the Askesian Society, a group of scientists who met regularly to talk about their latest theories and take laughing gas. In his day, Howard was a great inspiration for the likes of Goethe, Shelley, Constable and Ruskin.

And now he provides the starting point for new work by contemporary artist Serena Korda. Her latest show at Museum 52 includes all manner of different works, from theatre design to literature and meteorology.

Ah, those Swedes - give them guitars and they'll give you magic. Take Herman Dune for example, forming with the idea of meshing Sonic Youth, Pavement and Neil Diamond together, they have succeeded in making a towering musical hybrid that is both sincere and urgent.

The jewel in the crown of Club Fandango's week of events - if you haven't seen these guys, then firstly, what have you been doing for the last 2 years? And secondly, go to 229 and see this band, you silly, silly person.

Thursday 10th

After what feels like forever telling you about other people's parties, it's about time we threw one of our own.

Teaming up with the lovely ladies of the I Heart team, we're taking over The Macbeth and have invited some of our favourite promoters to come down and spin some tunes, with Dirty Water handling the garage rock, Sexbeat throwing down some crazy pop punk and our mate Robin romping us home with some amazing garage, hip hop and old style bangers. It should be a pretty killer night out.

Throw in a free barbeque, give-aways, and the chance to gawk at our drunk faces and you have to wonder what more you could ask for in a party?

Friday 11th

Anyone remember the awesome (if ridiculous) 1959 film of Jules Verne's Journey to the Center of the Earth? There was something about those vast fantastical underground caverns that was truly amazing, despite the shocking special effects, acting, plot etc...

Well, for his first UK solo show, American artist Ryan McGinley is showing 24 new colour photographs taken in caves across North America - they are, not least in the sense of retro mystery - somewhat reminiscent of the best bits of that cracking caper flick.

Populated by pearl-skinned nymphs, flitting among the dazzling rock formations, these are mesmeric images.

Despite having worked together since they met in Italy in 2003, American Chateau is the first public collaborative exhibition for artists Jaime Hayon and Nienke Klunder.

The exhibition fuses the functional with the non-functional to blur the line between art and design across a series of sculptural and two-dimensional pieces. Both highly contemporary and steeped in the opulence of the 17th century.

P.A.R.T.Y.

Yes, that's right, it's party time, courtesy of controversial East End art folks Decima. This Friday sees the George Tavern taken over by all manner of art types and local bands - there's live music from The Coolness, Tymon Dogg, Tricity Vogue and The Fucks and arty occurrences with Simon Ould, David C West, Stephen Gill and drunken poetry man Stephen Micalef.

The whole night is being put on in order to raise money for Decima's forthcoming Berlin-based exhibition. Britain's Rubbish will examine the state of the nation - corruption, individualism, fear, ridiculousness...

So go! It's only a fiver - it's for a good cause, it'll be bloody brilliant, and there'll most likely be people dressed up as dogs. What more could you want?

Another underground techno sesh from the Noisy Neighbours crew at Bar 54. There's a UK exclusive from a soon to be announced DJ.

Saturday 12th

Eh - calm down! Anna Friel (Brookside, first lesbian kiss on British TV, etc) stars opposite American Joseph Cross (Running With Scissors, Milk) as Holly Golightly in a new stage adaptation of the classic romantic comedy.

Based on a novel by Truman Capote, Breakfast at Tiffany's was famously made into a 1961 film with Audrey Hepburn and George Peppard. Many peoples' favourite film of all time. There have been several stage versions and this high gloss production promises to retain the humour and sparkle which is a feature of the film.

Time for something out of the ordinary. Longplayer is a piece of music commissioned by Artangel that will play for 1000 years and has been going since the start of the millennium.

It is of course the longest piece of non-repeating music ever composed, and tonight at the Roundhouse is your opportunity to listen to a 1000 minute section of it, played by a 26 piece orchestra on a unique 20-meter wide instrument. A truly philosophical piece.

Meander back to a time of neon colours, free-loving and 60s garage, Grind 'A' Go Go is a fancy dress night at the Working Men's Club filled with oddball delights.

Please Note: If you don't dress up you'll feel stupid. Think beehives, minidresses, suits and boots.

Sunday 13th

Insomnia is a genuinely cracking after party at the Aquarium and Raduno. The music policy steers a pretty Hoxditch line with lashings of minimal techno, a dash of electro and the odd tech house number thrown in.

The crowd, of course, are friendly, exhausted, and for the most part completely spanked - but the music is a treat. If stamina is the name of your game - and techno is what you like for breakfast - you won't do better than insomnia.

Shrugging off disasters that would stop lesser bands in their tracks (like having all their gear nicked by some dodgy git!) Blakfish bring joy and Propagandhi style riffage to the world by just being the knarliest bunch of Brummies since Sabbath.

Playing the Fighting Cocks tonight, it may be a mish to get to, but hell it'll be worth it!