Swoop de Grâce

And, by unanimous decision, the prize for most unwieldy exhibition title of 2009 goes to this bizarre-sounding Sean Edwards project at Limoncello. 'Portrait (for a screenplay) of Beth Harmon' - From the novel 'The Queen's Gambit' by Walter Tevis is a long-running project that features work by artists invited to take part by Edwards. The whole

A conceptual indie duo from London, by way of Essex, Swanton Bombs have been turning heads all summer by disseminating pounding riffs and tongue-in-cheek lyricism throughout the UK.

Sounding a bit like those weird songs on a Blur album, they're cute without ever crossing over into hopelessly twee territory, and could just be our new favourite band.

Since the release of their first album, 'If The Blues Comes Calling' in 2006, Birmingham-based bluegrass and swing outfit, The Toy Hearts, have gained an enviable reputation as one of the UK's hottest country acts. Taking influences from old US family outfits like The Carter Family, they're a dazzling array of bold harmonies, original songwriting

Trevor Griffiths' new play brings to life the radical author Thomas Paine, author of The Rights of Man and original inventor of the minimum wage, against a backdrop of ferment and revolution across Europe and the world. Paine was an English Radical born in 1737 who lived through times of massive change, when old shackles were cast off and freedom

Slutty Fringe is a blog. A music blog which mixes upfront club tracks with blistering copy. They turn three years old tonight (an age in blog terms) as well as celebrating the revamp of their site. They've bagged Trevor Jackson to spin some of his magic, plus Grovesnor with the full six piece band and I Haunt Wizards playing live. The indomitable

After three quiet years off the live circuit, Edinburgh Fringe favourites 'The Trap' return with a brand new sketch show. Comprising of Jeremy Limb, Paul Litchfield and Dan Mersh, the trio were renowned for their Bad Play show series - a parody of student theatre using innovative multimedia and ludicrous props like glass bagpipes and tandem bikes

Established indie-dance troupe Simian Mobile Disco join the hotly-tipped Bloody Beetroots to headline an official after-party for South London's iconic electronic summer day festival at Clapham Common, Get Loaded In the Park. In Room 1 Wetyourself residents Peter Pixzel & Co. provide solid support for the Simian boys with crackin' electro

Everybody loves Notting Hill Carnival, the two-day street party in West London celebrating Caribbean culture and offering the chance to dance in the streets to a variety of different sounds, from laid back reggae and dub to funk, soul, house, bassline, grime, dubstep, drum n bass and hip hop. The predominant sound is Soca, and Calypso from the

More than a viable alternative to Carnival, the Old Queen's Head's Bank Holiday blow-outs are the stuff of legend. 12 hours of the freshest and best music from a discerning selection of bands and DJs, with two floors of drinking and dancing mayhem.

We always love this pub but it really comes alive when there's no school on a Monday. For a North London session, this is the place to be, with Neon Gold, The Rakes and Does It Offend You, Yeah? leading the charge.

Sweet as.

One of the best-looking parties surrounding the Carnival this year is S.L.A.C.K's bash at the Metropolitan. Even though it's not a late one, the line-up featuring Shy FX and Annie Mac means breaks in your face and dancehall sounds to keep your grin plastered on until just in time for the last tube.

The Metropolitan is a quality boozer just a few steps away from the north end of Portobello Road, and this party is sure to get jammed - it might well be worth bagging a ticket in advance.

Spoonfed is pretty excited about this little kernel of loveliness. Major Lazer Soundsystem puts on an almighty spread of Diplo, Switch, Buraka Som Sistema's J-Wow and scores more of cutting edge DJs. Expect the finest electro, disco, techno and global sounds.

Not only that, but there will be a complimetary BBQ, free drinks on offer AND it's free entry. What's the catch? You have to be on the guestlist to get in.

Email rsvp@uk.redbull.com with your name to see if there's any room for a little one.

An extraordinary piece of documentary theatre by Jonathan Holmes, telling the story of Hurricane Katrina, and the millions of New Orleans citizens left stranded by their government in the aftermath. The shockingly slow reaction of the Bush government, when citizens had to fend for themselves for up to a week, was one of the low-points of modern American history.

Using survivor testimonies, media clips and the incredibly rich musical heritage of New Orleans, Jericho House have created a sensory collage across all four floors of this atmospheric warehouse venue. The show takes its audience on a journey through a flooded city, meeting determined or desolate characters and marveling at the destruction wreaked on a cultural heartland.

London four-piece Cherbourg have been making smart tongues wag and young hearts flutter in the capital for a few months now and have been rewarded with a show at the ICA.

Known as much for their virtuosity as for their soaring pop edged melodies, dynamic compositions and glorious four part vocal harmonies, they're definitely worth checking out if you're at all into Fleet Foxes or Frightened Rabbit.

There's a bit of a vogue for fusions at the moment what with Zombie Dickens and all that, but this saucy show at Theatre503 has been around for a few years. It's a sharp, salacious example of genre-splicing.

21st Century writer Bret, master of all things crude and downright filthy battles it out with the queen of all things proper, Jane Austen, in this hilarious look at two writers craving change: whilst Jane wants to be a bit more 'explicit', Bret longs to be more poetic.

The Black Sea Gentlemen have come a long way since they exploded onto the British comedy circuit in 2006, earning themselves a stack of 5 star reviews at the Edinburgh Fringe. They have been travelling the globe, packing out theatres from Budapest to the Sydney Opera House and ringmaster Mikelangelo has toured the world as part of the Olivier-award winning cabaret show La Clique.

After a long wait they have finally returned to London and from the 2nd-12th September they will be playing songs from their third album, Dead Men Tell A Thousand Tales, at the Bloomsbury Theatre.

It is the unique quality of their act that makes the show so enjoyable; the Gentlemen have been described as gypsy rock with an eastern-European flavour but there is a lot more cabaret to it than just dark, Balkan-edged songs. It is a sort of macabre 'Kabaret Noir' with tales of taxidermy, sodomy and death and a cast of gargoyles, demons, dancing skeletons and doomed sailors.

Whether it's Guido Libido the legend of Balkan Western cinema regaling you with some chilling stories or the baritone Mikelangelo serenading the ladies, each of the Gentlemen has their own character and musical talent so there's never a dull moment.

The wonderful Canary Wharf Film Festival returns this September for the third time, bringing with it a host of the most exciting short films produced within the UK and around the world. There’s award-winning shorts from major festivals like Cannes and Sundance, a focus on Serbian cinema, all manner of other films, the Big Film Quiz, a photographic competition, archival documentaries and, of course the Golden Canary Awards Show to finish the whole thing off in style.

From 3rd – 7th September, four venues across Docklands are playing host to a busy programme of screenings and events. Taking place at Cineworld West India Quay and Museum of London Docklands are short films divided into four distinct strands.

Having seen some of their weird mixed media sculptures sitting about in one of the back rooms at Vegas Gallery we can vouch for the fact that the work of Dutch art duo Heringa / Van Kalsbeek is absolutely stunning.

Well now the gallery presents their first UK solo show - these weird, dark, magical works really are incredible, so go and check it out.

'Ooh nice cuppa tea, Alan Bennett, eeeeh, woollen jumper. Eeeh not in my day, lad. Oooh no. Know what I mean?'

'No idea I'm afraid old thing. What?'

Yes! It's tea time! Well, at Spoonfed it's always tea time. And so it is too at SDC Gallery (well for two months this autumn that is).

There's lots of tea sets and a variety of accoutrements produced by an array of contemporary artists and designers.

'And jolly nice some of them are too.'

'Eeeeeeeh.'

Stripes: check. Stings: check. Ability to produce honey: check. Yup, there can be no doubt about it, bees totally frickin' rule. And it looks like those lovely folks at the South Bank Centre agree too.

The first weekend of September sees a load of venues round the area taken over by a swarm of different insects (with bees featuring rather strongly). There's a termite pavilion, a beehive in a taxi, an insect circus museum and a load of other weird and wonderful bits and bobs.

As Jerry Macguire might have said (were he a bee or indeed Winnie the Pooh) 'Show me the honey!'

Set in Hainault Forest, a beautiful woodland area just outside London, Offset Festival is quite a change from your usual mudfest. With over 150 artists playing over 7 stages, there's something here to satisfy everyone. They get some pretty big headliners as well; last year saw Wire and Gang Of Four rocking the main stage.

Unbelievably this year is looking like it'll be even better with seminal post-punks The Slits and A Certain Ratio both appearing as well as slots from The Horrors, Metronomy, Future of the Left, ex-Can frontman Damo Suzuki, Scottish party punks Dananananakroyd and surprising screamo mentalists Rolo Tomassi as well as over 150 more!

Many, many people would name the movie based on Stephen King's novella, The Shawshank Redemption starring Tim Robbins and Morgan Freeman, as their favourite film of all time. It's so great, it even breaks down the  resistance of hardened Spoonfed cynics. You have to love it.

Produced by Dublin's Gaiety Theatre, the stage version is by all accounts very different... but also rather brilliant. The staging is so convincing that audiences and critics report a real sense of fear and claustrophobia, of being transported inside the prison walls where our heroes languish. But the plot, with its oppression, despair and indomitable hope, remains and has sent punters charging out onto the streets filled with hope and energy.

Live At The Chapel has been running for nearly two years and it still manages to produce top class bills every month. Tonight's line-up consists of the bumbling charms of comedy whirlwind Mark Watson, the eccentric and spontaneous Phil Kay, if.comedy nominee and character comedian Pippa Evans and the lovable and laconic Alun Cochrane. There will also be a surprise 20 minute set from a huge TV star.

Alpha-Ville is the first in a series of audiovisual events. They mesh electronic music, digital media, visual treats and short film.

Within the plush environs of Bloomsbury's Horse Hospital, the debut looks subversive and interesting, straying from the predictable clubnight formula and importing cutting edge European talent to the heart of London.

Glue returns after a storming launch party, dishing up a caustic bumper crop of electro, breaks, house and all breeds of rave.

Heading up this edition are excellent bass-face buccaneers and Z Shed residents the Pirate Soundsystem. Fidget, bassline, grime, breaks and dubstep in one handy package.

Hot on their heels is Mr No Hands - resident of Ali B's breaks night Air plus Apply The Breaks - the breakspoll winning breakbeat collective. The excellent James Furness returns from Ibiza to join the indomitable Glue residents: Hell Yeah, Bump and Mittens.

You know that mysterious black object that the creepy family is staring at on the cover of Led Zeppelin's 'Presence' album? Fol Chen sound like that.

Well with a bit more Amun Dull and Pere Ubu thrown in, but you get the picture. Anyway, tonight the LA dance punks make a triumphant return to The Windmill, and it should get really messy.

Stanhope is a raging, no-holds-barred stand-up and is probably the closest thing you will see to Bill Hicks working in comedy today. He himself describes his act as 'fetish'; a kind of comedy that's been beaten until it's both black and blue. It's wrong, it's sick, but you're getting a kick out of it at the same time.

He managed to trigger a mass walk-out at the Pimm's Summerfest in Holland Park last year as he rolled on stage drunk and lambasted everyone and everything from women to the Paralympics; so if you're planning on going - don't take your mum.