6th February 2012

gigs clubbing art comedy theatre blog competitions

Illustration by Julie Khan

Down with the Kids

The weather is out, school is finished for another year, and all across London the capital’s kiddies are at a loose end. There’s only so much children can eat ice cream, play football, hang around in Topshop or stab each other before they begin to look for other things to do. Which is why we at Spoonfed – ever helpful – have compiled a few cool ideas for entertaining the wee things. It’s called, rather aptly, London for Kids, so check it out.

Next week there’s also a load of wicked events that’ll appeal not only to those in short trousers but to real grown-up adult types too. And there’s a definite good-time outdoor vibe going on. East London gallery Limoncello are doing a Summer Fete, whilst the Queen of Hoxton hosts a Fete Worse Than Death, Vauxhall Spring Gardens is putting on Milk in the Park and Riverside Studios has got a Summer Circus and a beer garden. Splendid, no?

Friday 7th

'James Mullinger was a fully paid up member of the feminist movement when he studied for his degree in Women's Studies at university. But ten years on, having worked on a men's magazine retouching women within an inch of their lives and as a stand-up comedian telling jokes that some deem misogynistic; he's worried about his feminist credentials.'

As befitting a band whose last UK hit was a duet with Peter Doherty, Littl'ans are no strangers to chaos. In fact their last British tour was cancelled thanks to a teen movie's worth of disasters, including a drug bust, exploding gas canisters and a double booking with Echo and the Bunnymen. When they do play, their doo-wop influenced pop has

We Fear Silence make the journey to the underground confines of Corsica Studios for an exclusive London takeover by Subloaded - Bristol's answer to FWD/DMZ.Tonight's bass heavy badness features a stellar cast of West Country dub-heads. Leading the charge is tectonic lynchpin Pinch, plus Appleblim, Peverelist and Headhunter. Joker and Gemmy

Saturday 8th

An hour of fast-paced sketch comedy with The Intimate Strangers, featuring the all-singing, all-dancing James Bond Musical Casinos are Forever.

This is a new show from the Strangers who performed with aplomb at last year's Camden Fringe, pulling off some really strong and innovative sketches.

Supernova launched last Sunday at Sosho, and this week they welcome the simply fabulous DJ Justin Martin to dish out his upfront brand of house and techno.

Resident of Buzzin' Fly, co-owner of DirtyBird, this guy is SERIOUS.

Former Faction residents Chris Low and Jason Faction launched a new residency at The Bathhouse - the brand new East London club venue which is a former Turkish baths.

Expect punk, funk, Italo disco, ghettotech, and other bouncy, bassy bits and bobs. Tonight's special guests are Beppe Loda (Typhoon Club, Italy), Dan Phuong and Emil Grelck.

Basic land to bring intimate, house party-style clubbing back to London. They feel that clubbing has become too focussed on the DJs - and so they never release their no frills line ups prior to the party - preferring it to remain a surprise. They revel in the old fundamentals: good tunes, friends, smiles, dancing - the house party vibe. Expect

Sunday 9th

Smith and Priestley's summer institution is a true original which contrasts the dingy atmosphere of most daytime parties and still retains a considerable edge over similar efforts. The shift of venue to the Light Bar has been a happy one - marrying discerning beats to a brilliantly thought-out venue. Helping to supply the sunshine techno and

A straight edge hardcore band, The Effort blend the modern youth crew sound of late '90s Boston with the socially conscious lyrics of artists like Inside Out, 108, and Boy Sets Fire.

So that'll be one beat down followed by a hug and a collectivist lecture afterwards.

Monday 10th

Following in the footsteps of great US indie/rock bands like Pavement, The National's march to fame and riches began when they moved en masse from their Ohio home to Brooklyn and began working crap, mundane jobs.

Clearly inspired by this experience, they have since made a glittering career out of singing songs about love and war intertwined with songs about money and office life, in a style that ranges from country pop to indie.

'Who was right - Orwell or Huxley? Are we amusing ourselves to death?'

Expect angry tirades followed by quiet musings from passionate liberal Robin Ince as he presents his new show at the Camden Fringe. His 2008 solo work (Bleeding Heart Liberal) was spectacular; full of witty, self-deprecating anecdotes and rants at right-wing journalists and religious nuts. We can't wait to see the latest installment.

Tuesday 11th

Inspired by Jack Kerouac's On The Road, Damo Suzuki has spent almost the last 50 years wandering Europe and making music. One of the driving forces behind Can's influential mid-'70s period, he is now revered by prog rock aficionados the world over thanks to his work with Damo Suzuki and Friends and his forward thinking label Damo's Network. Making a rare live appearance at the Hoxton Square Bar and Kitchen tonight, you officially don't like music if you don't try your hardest to get to this.

Riverside Studios is an excellent spot for a bit of summertime fun, with a beer garden that commands magnificent views overlooking the Thames. This summer they're running a lot of family-friendly events which provide the perfect excuse to hand your kids over to a professional entertainer while you take your seat outside and enjoy a cold beer.

Albert and Friends Instant Circus are Riverside favourites and return to the space this year with Summer Circus: a full day of traditional circus activities and family fun. Basically it gives the kids a chance to admire and learn from professional clowns, jugglers and acrobats, and to pick up some skills which they can practise ad nauseam for the rest of August. And it gives you a chance to relax.

Wednesday 12th

An impossibly young bunch of indie kids from Berkeley, California, The Morning Benders are resurrecting The Beach Boys and channelling them through Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young to make some incredibly sweet dream pop.

It sounds a little Cast in places, but in a really good way.

Markeline, a dynamic company from the Basque region, present a thrilling, emotional outdoor cabaret in the squares outside the National Theatre.

Carbon Club tells the story of a coal mine through the lives of miners who take the stage to tell their stories, sing songs or recall the ghosts of fallen comrades. It's a gloriously camp show - but heartbreaking at the same time.

Thursday 13th

What with email, Twitter, Facebook and all manner of other computer communication things rather taking over the world, the future looks a little bleak for the humble postcard.

Why bother sending a postcard to one person when you could write on someone's wall and let everyone read how bloody great your holiday is?

Well, because now a collaboration between MA Fine Art students at Chelsea College of Art and Design and some leading contemporary artists has resulted in some pretty cool postcard designs.

They're being auctioned off at the ICA on the 13th August and the proceeds go towards the students' MA show. Sounds cool.

St Petersburg's Mariinksy Ballet pay tribute to the late, great choreographer George Ballanchine with a triple bill of works set to Stravinsky, Bizet and Tchaikovsky.

Remarkably, tickets are still available for what promises to be an extraordinary showcase. The Mariinsky are the foremost ballet company in the world and their Balanchine repertoire has been honed over decades.

Friday 14th

One of the most proflific artists of his generation, Billy Childish has haunted the dreams of musicians for neigh on 20 years with a never ending conveyer belt of paintings, poetry and LPs. Seriously this guy is like the Simpsons in so far as that as soon as you think you've come up with a orginal idea, you can bet your life Childish has thought of it first.

With his latest combo, The Musicians of the British Empire, Billy carries on his tradition of home made punk and rhythm and blues, singing odes to Joe Strummer and nodding to The Who, whilst showing the next generation what a real rock 'n' roll group sounds like.

Utah Saints night Sugarbeat has been rocking Leeds, Edinburgh and Bristol and now they come to London.

They have been rocking Jamm on a bi-monthly basis and tonight they welcome XFM breaks junkie Eddy Temple-Morris and Finger Lickin' hotshot A Skillz.

Saturday 15th

All the fun of the fair at Limoncello Gallery this Saturday. Of course, being an art thing though, there's a bit of a twist on the usual WI marrow-judging contests.

As well as fun stuff like a fashion show, jelly-eating contest, and assorted live music, crafts and tombola, there's also 'sponge the gallerist' and the amusingly entitled 'pin the tail on the Wallinger'.

Fancy dress, apparently, is 'not mandatory but encouraged'. Sounds ace!

Milk in the Park is a great, big musical disco in the heart of The Vauxhall Gay Village in Lambeth. Horse Meat Disco, Carpet Burn, Deep Inside and Tonker unite to celebrate equality and freedom.

Milk In The Park commemorates the life of Harvey Milk - the first gay American politician and pioneer of gay rights. It's also 40 years since the Stonewall riots and five years since gay bar Eagle opened its doors.

Horse Meat Disco will be hosting the main area, welcoming disco/funk giant Candi Staton to the stage for what will undoubtedly be a euphoric performance. She's backed up by disco legends Crazy P, Prins Thomas, Trevor Jackson and the Horse Meat residents.

The Tattershall Castle is not actually a castle at all, but a boat permanently moored on Victoria Embankment that has hosted some of the best comedy acts for the last seven years.

A favourite with fans and comedians alike, it's not unknown for them to announce a surprise big-name guest at the start of a show, so whatever the line up, it's always worth jumping aboard.

Sunday 16th

We challange you to find anyone who doesn't like Elvis just a little bit. Yeah people will harp on that he was a talentless junkie who never wrote a song, but bang on 'Suspicious Minds' and they'll be like putty in your hands. That's why he's the King and we're all just lesser mortals.

The guy is so powerful that his reach extends from beyond the grave. Spoonfed's favourite Elvis story has to be the one about the guy who died and wanted 'Love Me Tender' as his coffin slid gracefully into the crematorium flames, and the well-meaning vicar mis-operated the CD player so the guy was cast into the holy fire to the strains of 'Return to Sender'. Urban legend? Possibly, but it's still funny.

Anyway the 12 Bar Club is spending this Sunday night praying to The King. 'Lord almighty, we can feel our temperature rising'.

A Fete Worse Than Death launches at the fabulous Queen of Hoxton for a day of relentless revelry. Expect a 'village green' on the roof terrace, with a BBQ, tea and cakes, and party games. As if this wasn't enough, you'll bathe in the warming glow of disco, courtesy of some of London's most notorious figures on the disco circuit, including Disco Bloodbath's Damon Martin.